Broken Heart

My heart got broken exactly four years ago today when my Papa died. I felt the world stopped and my heart stopped beating when they told me my Papa was gone.

I couldn't believe that my Papa who was so strong-willed will succumb to death without a fight. I always believed that my Papa would survive and spring back to life. That's how I viewed Papa, someone so strong and gentle at the same time, kind, understanding and loving. I love him so much.

A big part of me died when my Mama died two years before Papa. Yes, I must admit I have never really gotten over the death of my parents. Don't try to talk me out of my sadness if you still have both your parents with you. Talk is cheap. You will never feel the pain I have in my heart. You will never fit in my shoes. If you also lost both your parents, please impart some words of wisdom to me if you can, please. So I can move on...Yes, this is a cry for help.

I always asked God why he took my Mama and Papa away from me. I know, you will tell me that they're happy in heaven now. A lot of people told me that. Yes, I know for a fact that my parents are in heaven now. Why? Because my parents were so kind, loving and understanding. I would never trade anything in the world for them. They're the best parents one could ever wish for.

I hope things will get better now that I understand that this isn't the end and I will see my mama and papa again. I am lucky I was able to give him a big hug and a kiss before his heart attack. But still, it is difficult to hold back the tears and to stop my longing for my parents.

It’s difficult to let both of you go but I must…I know I must....Please Pray with me for my Papa's Death Anniversary today...I am literally crying when I compose this post-(

Loving God,

Listen to our prayer as we remember Constancio Sy on the anniversary of his death.
We thank you for the good things you have done among us by his life and example.
Grant that he may rejoice with you in heaven, as we journey to your kingdom.
Keep us faithful in following the way of Jesus that we may live in your love.
We ask this through Jesus Christ our Lord.
Amen.